"My clothes don't fit me anymore!"

My wild imagination conjures images of halter tops, blue jeans, and business suits conspiring against their owner in the darkness of the crowded closet.

"Psssst! What do you say we shrink a couple of sizes by morning so that when she reaches for the ensemble of the day, they fit her like Saran Wrap!!" cackles the flowery skirt to the mishievous silk blouse.

Or maybe the dress shirt shrinks to a size 14 neck just to spite the man headed to his much anticipated job interview!

Nope.

This doesn't happen. At least not outside of my warped head.

But people--and I am guilty of this at times myself--love to use the phrase "my clothes don't fit me anymore!"

The hard part to swallow here is that unless you ran your clothes through the wrong cycle or misread the care instructions, your clothes had little to do with the fact that you needed a shoe horn to fit into them this morning. And even in those examples, YOU are the one who screwed up.

You see, clothes don't stop fitting you anymore than clutter piles up on your desk. Dishes don't hold meetings on your kitchen counters and bills don't stack up on their own.

There is no mystery here.

YOU are the one doing all of this.

Yes, GASP, YOU are the one who doesn't fit YOUR clothes anymore!

While your clothes sat there waiting to be worn, YOU decided to have an extra slice of cake at the company birthday party. YOU decided that watching the ballgame was more important than the evening walk with the family. YOU decided to let yourself go.

YOU are the one who betrayed YOUR clothes! Not the other way around!

Sometimes, if you are lucky, you find that your clothes fit a little LOOSER, not tighter.

That's when you can set aside the exercise, the sensible diet, change in lifestyle, and head to the closet to thank all of your clothes for fitting you so nicely all of a sudden.

After all, THEY get all the blame when things go wrong. So why not shower them with the credit sometimes, too?

The self esteem of your sweats will never be the same again.