Two More Reasons I Feel Old

In case you haven’t heard, an updated version of the 1980’s “Knight Rider” series is debuting this weekend as a two hour movie. I was hoping the earliest rumors were false, but lo and behold we have another “Re-tread in the Age of No New Ideas” on our hands.

I was a kid in grammar school when the original series starring David Hasselhoff was all the rage on television. Every kid (and maybe some adults, I’m sure) dreamed of having their very own talking black Trans Am that could drive itself and talk to you and enage its Turbo Boost if you needed to make up a few extra minutes by jumping a train.

I remember seeing one of the actual cars from the series on a family trip to Universal Studios. Way back in the days when DeLoreans made good time machines.

Well, the Turbo Boost feature is gone (bad for the ozone maybe?) and KITT is now a black Ford Mustang (no hip youth of today even knows what a Trans Am is). And KITT stands for Knight Industries THREE Thousand. Hey! When I was a kid, it stood for Knight Industries TWO Thousand.

But that’s because I am old. Look at me. Sitting here in my pajamas blogging about a television show that is more than a quarter of a century old now. OUCH. That hurt just to say it!

Why remake “Knight Rider” anyway? Why not come up with a NEW idea?? Hey, here’s one they could have used during the writer’s strike.

A futuristic Prius that not only gets 500 miles to the gallon, but drives by itself, too! It could have the little red light bobbing back and forth as it silently cruises the highways looking for soccer moms driving alone in 9-miles to the gallon SUVs. Then it could fire Vegan bullets at the tires and drive them off the road! Yay!! Instead of chasing after petty thiefs and white collar criminals, the new Veggie Delight Rider could nab people with too many children or those who refuse to reuse their towels day after day in hotels!

Now THERE’S some entertainment! And original, too!

And now my second latest reason for feeling old…

Polaroid has announced it will discontinue production of its instand film. The company already stopped making their cameras over the last couple of years.

Man, remember Polaroids??

If you are a kid today, you probably think that’s something Barry Bonds took before all of those home runs.

No, Polaroids were revolutionary cameras that let you develop your pictures almost instantly. The first models actually came out in the 1940s, but I remember the one my father had in the 70s and 80s. Remember? With the big red button? All you had to do was point, snap, and shake the picture the camera spit out and there you had it. A photograph!!

Today’s kids are raised on even more instant gratification. Digital cameras. Polaroids today seem like a cheap movie prop where you can see the strings holding it up. But they were so much fun in the day. I might have to buy one on e-Bay and create a stockpile of film before it’s too late.

Someday I can whip them out and show my grandkids what Polaroids were, along with shadow puppets and imagination.

Guess who else must be feeling old? Actor Val Kilmer. He went from being Batman and Doc Holliday and a big shot star to voicing the new KITT in “Knight Rider”.

We both must be wondering where all those lines on our faces came from.

Where’s Turbo Boost when you need it?