Environmentalists Out Of My Bathroom!

People either praise me or condemn me for using the term “environmental fascism” with regards to runaway, radical green policies and agendas.

I don’t use the term lightly.

It isn’t environmental fascism when you throw your garbage in the trash and teach your kids to keep our rivers and oceans clean, etc.

It IS environmental fascism when you try to regulate the color car I drive and the size television I can own.

And it is environmental fascism when you start telling me that my TOILET PAPER is too cushy and soft.

Turns out that is another front the radicals are taking on in their never ending Save Mother Earth hysteria.

You see, the cushier and more comfortable your toilet paper is, the more damage it is causing to the environment, according to an article in today’s Washington Post.

Ever been in the bathroom of a business that proudly displays its GREEN, Earth Friendly toilet paper?

You got it. Might as well be using SAND PAPER. It HURTS.

NO THANKS.

I will NOT make my kids use green, politically correct toilet paper because the Chicken Little – SHEEP mentality dictates that to me.

San Francisco has already decided that using plastic bags is a greater crime than shooting up in neighborhood park, so let cities like that try to ban cushy and comfortable toilet paper.

If I cannot have peace and love and understanding in my OWN BATHROOM, then nothing is sacred.

Go use your eco-nutball paper and go sand down some furniture with it.

I will continue using my 3-ply, planet busting brand and relish every moment of its blissful comfort.

Oh, and read my lips: LEAVE ME AND MY FAMILY ALONE.