What's worse? Public sex or spitting?
According to the Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, both are downright offensive, inappropriate and could soon be outlawed in city parks.
The proposed ban on spitting is one of about 13 behaviors the park department wants to regulate - from smoking to having public sex.
"It's more a public decorum question - the visual aspects," said Eric Friedli in an interview with The Seattle Times. He's the guy in charge of policy for the parks department.
However, many recreational athletes are confused by the proposed ban - joggers routinely need to spit during their daily runs. And baseball enthusiasts wondered if sunflower seeds would be outlawed.
The city's move to legislate spitting has many local residents outraged. Some are wondering what's next - perhaps a ban on chewing gum?
That's absurd, said Friedli.
"I can't imagine going that far," he told The Times.
Friedeli acknowledged that the public isn't exactly on board with the proposed spitting ban - and suggested it only has about a ten percent chance of getting passed into law. Under the plan - third time offenders would be banned from parks and beaches for up to 30 days.
It also includes a ban on public intercourse, prostitution and indecent exposure. Heaven only knows what would happen if a perpetrator is caught spitting during sex.
The smoking ban, though, seems destined to be included - along with regulations on backpacks, fireworks, and bathroom sex.
But the locals are fuming. "It is not up to the board to impose their cultural mores on the rest of the city," read one email to The Times.
The board will make its final recommendations next month.
Since the good folks out in Seattle are about to regulate bodily functions - how about legislating flatulence? I can imagine the city's public service campaign: "Breaking Wind is Breaking the Law."
On second thought, that just might cause an even bigger stink.
Be sure to check out Todd's website!