From time to time, I find it necessary to brag on my people. I come from a line of over achievers For whatever reason, I never swam around in that section of the family gene pool. So I'm constantly in awe our family tree. And seeing how part of our family is from Mississippi, I would like to verify that our family tree does --- in fact -- have branches.

Yep --- I'm mighty proud of our brood. Folks like my Aunt Patty who won a year's supply of cat food on Wheel of Fortune. And then there's Uncle Chico -- who is in the South Carolina Sports Hall of Fame -- and has a football stadium named in his memory at Travelers Rest High School. My Aunt Norma is known for her amazing culinary skills.
And my Uncle Gene used to be the pilot for King Hussein of Jordan and Aristotle Onassis. Let's see --- my Uncle Jerry from Coldwater, Mississippi sells guns to people moving away from Memphis. He's a pretty popular guy. Whenever I need to cover a story in downtown Memphis, he offers to lend me Aunt Lynn's glock. I politely decline, though. The pen, they say, is mightier than the sword. Stupider, too.
So the next generation of our family is off to a rip-roaring start -- and leading the pack is Cousin Billy -- who is graduating from high school this spring. He's also one of the best swimmers and cross country runners in the state.
He just wrapped up a fantastic swim season and concluded his high school career with his best times ever in the 100 freestyle. We are quite proud!
For Christmas I gave him a t-shirt. It read: IF SWIMMING WAS EASY, IT'D BE CALLED FOOTBALL. I'm not sure why, but he doesn't wear that shirt out much.
Billy is just an all around great American. As the song goes, "He's pretty fly, for a white guy."
During the summer he lifeguards on the Jersey shore. It's a pretty awesome job, really. I think every guy has visions of jetting through the waves to rescue beautiful women and bring them back to life.
But Billy says lifeguarding isn't exactly like its portrayed on Baywatch.

For one thing, Billy says that most of the good looking people know how to swim. Come to think of it, we never saw David Hasselhoff giving mouth-to-mouth to an overweight 70 year old.