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Fried Chicken & Naked Carjackers

 By Todd Starnes

The following is a transcript of Todd’s afternoon Fox News Radio commentary. His commentaries are heard daily on radio stations around the nation at 6 a.m., 10 a.m. and 3 p.m. daily.

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A LITTLE BIT OF THIS AND A LITTLE BIT OF THAT. I’M TODD STARNES WITH THIS FOX NEWS AND COMMENTARY NEXT.

ACK – COMMERCIAL

HAPPY NATIONAL FRIED CHICKEN DAY.

TWENTY FOUR HOURS OF FINGER LICKING GOOD FUN

UNLESS YOU HAPPEN TO BE A CHICKEN.

THERE’S EVEN A FACEBOOK PAGE DEDICATED TO THE FOOD HOLIDAY.

POULTRY OF COURSE — KNOWN AS THE GOSPEL BIRD IN THE SOUTHERN STATES.

BAPTIZED IN BUTTERMILK AND MARTHA WHITE FLOUR

DEEP FRIED IN A CAST IRON SKILLET.

I’VE GOT TWO FAVORITE CHICKEN JOINTS.

THERE’S GUS’S IN MEMPHIS

AND MARY MAC’S TEA ROOM IN ATLANTA.

I’M PARTIAL TO MARY MAC’S BECAUSE THE HOSTESS

WALKS AROUND THE DINING ROOM GIVING FOLKS BACK RUBS.

AND FIRST-TIMERS GET A FREE BOWL OF POT-LIKKER.

IT’S A SOUTHERN THING.

AND PHOENIX POLICE DEALING WITH A NAKED CARJACKER.

JOHN BRIGHAM IS THE SUSPECT — STOLE AT LEAST TWO CARS

MISTER BRIGHAM GOT CAUGHT AFTER HE CRASHED — APPARENTLY HOPPED UP ON HAPPY JUICE.

YOU KNOW — IT’S NEVER A GOOD IDEA TO DRIVE A STICK SHIFT BUCK NAKED.

I’M TODD STARNES