The Virgin Mary Does Not Appear On Dried Mangos. Promise.

Although I no longer am a Catholic, I was raised as one and practiced for much of my life.

I am NOT against the Virgin Mary and have prayed to her many times over the years.

But come on now.

She may have appeared at Lourdes many years ago. And no doubt she has made herself visible to many others.

But on a DRIED MANGO?!?!

An arizona teenager claims that he was snacking on dried mango pieces when one particular one startled him.

It was…in the shape of…the Virgin Mary.

I’ve seen the picture on the Internet. And yes, it kind of DOES look like the Virgin Mary.

But the cloud outside my window looks like Ed Asner, but I am pretty sure it isn’t him.

Much of this comes from something I discovered in the world of ghost hunting and paranormal investigating. It’s been dubbed “matrixing” and in its simplest definition refers to how our brain takes something unfamiliar and interprets it in a familiar way.

In other words, that smudge on the window becomes a face staring at us. Or the tree stump becomes a Bigfoot looming over us. It helps explain the “face” on Mars.

As well as the Virgin Mary in a dried mango.

Think of this for a minute. It’s ridiculous.

If the Virgin Mary is going to make an appearance, do you think it will be as a dried mango stuffed in a store bought snack bag??

WHY??

It makes NO SENSE whatsoever. And what if someone wasn’t paying attention? Or the eater was blind? Then what?

She would have wasted a perfectly good appearance.

I’m not saying Jesus hasn’t appeared before people. I just don’t think he’d appear on a slice of toast. Anymore than the Virgin Mary is going to appear on a slice of dried tropical fruit.

And now if you’ll excuse me. Our daughter has a waffle breakfast that looks strikingly like Barbara Boxer frowning and I must investigate before the syrup destroys the evidence.